AHDM4U HOROSCOPES: SAGITTARIUS

Last month we introduced you to AHDM4U’s “psychic” Boopie, a.k.a tiny_hairz. This babe “channels” your “future” via the art of gif. Check out her last read on Scorpio bbs here.

But this time it’s all about you, Sagittarius. Boopie is back in the building, ready to share some unprompted knowledge. She’s been in a recovery from a 13 hour Scandal binge and listening to Reasonable Doubt. Needless to say, she’s in the zone y’all!

SAGITTARIUS

Sagittarius you’re best known as an adventurous heartbreaker, on some Into The Wild shit,

A little of this:

sprinkled with some Legend of the Fall:

As you may already may be sensing thanks to the general malaise that’s enveloped you:

… and from the sober tone of the preceding gifs you’ve actually got a weepy, pitiful road ahead. Hold up, hold up! Don’t completely flip out. All your girl tiny_hairz is trying to tell you is that unlike the constant shine you’re usually on:

… you may want to stick a little closer to home this month. And when I say stay close, I mean wile out Grey Gardens style:

Some of this:

(that’s actually me this weekend watching Scandal)

Now you’re probably thinking, isn’t a horoscope supposed to encourage me to be my best person? Shouldn’t it’s read of the moon, stars and planets help me to anticipate what stands before me and lead me down a righteous path?

HELL NO:

NO:

NO. I said take that coat OFF and let me learn you:

First of all, your work life is hitting a steady, solid stride. Steady, strong and, I imagine, LOUD as my girl Kerry Washington’s Olivia Pope in Scandal:

You know, with accessories:

And again, from the back:

I digress … but yes Sag, you will run shit at the jobby-job on an epic Olivia Pope, “got the Prez whipped” scale. That’s a metaphor, don’t go Olivia and sleep with your coworkers. That brings me to my second point: Don’t take any risks right now

Anyway, you’ll travel in the New Year. For now stay at home:

And as for the rest of y’all…
CAPRICORN

AQUARIUS

PISCES

ARIES

TAURUS

GEMINI

CANCER

LEO

VIRGO

LIBRA

SCORPIO

About 4U Mag (264 Articles)
A lifestyle magazine by Kelly Lovemonster and Caitlin Donohue. Not a total vanity project.